Why You Should Consider Marriage Counseling Before Things Get Messy
Marriage can be difficult. There's no definitive guide that helps you know the exact right things to do or say as life goes on. There's no chapter on how to successfully balance work and life. Life doesn't come with a one-size-fits-all solution when it comes to marriage and our relationships.
Most commonly, people assume that marriage counseling is for those who are already facing conflict. After all, how often do you see a happy couple on tv and in movies receiving counseling? It may be surprising to hear, but marriage counseling is not just for those who can't stand the sight of each other!
Every couple can benefit from marriage counseling, even the happy ones! Even if you are not facing any hard issues in your relationship currently, you can still learn plenty of things from counseling. Here are just a few.
Counseling Teaches Better Communication Skills
One of the greatest benefits of counseling is that it helps couples learn better communication techniques. Communication in a relationship is hands down one of the biggest struggles we see couples face. In fact, not being able to communicate clearly with each other is often one of the leading unofficial causes of divorce.
Even if you believe communication is not an issue in your relationship, it is always a skill that can never stop being improved on. Communicating with each other is more than just, "Honey, how was your day?" or "Did you take the trash out this morning?"
Effective communication in a relationship means you are open and vulnerable with each other. Do you both feel safe to truly express how you are feeling? No masking required? When your partner speaks, are you truly hearing them? Not just their voice, but what they are telling you? Counseling teaches you to not only be a better communicator but a better listener, as well.
Resolve Issues Before They Become A Problem
Sometimes, we need a different perspective on the issues we are facing. Relationship or marriage problems are no exception to this. If you feel that there are certain aspects of your marriage that could be a problem, counseling gives you a safe space to air this out. Just like you can learn to communicate better, counseling can teach you better conflict resolution.
You can address things that may be bothering you about your partner or your marriage. Addressing them now can actually help you to avoid heated arguments ahead of time. Whether that is setting boundaries with each other's families or parenting your children, talking about them now can help. An outside perspective from a therapist looks at the whole picture from a non-biased and non-judgmental standpoint.
It Corrects Assumptions You Tell Yourself Are True
Let's face it, we all make up stories in our heads. Stories about "the way it is," in our marriages. Take this for an example. Your partner wakes up earlier than you do and gets household chores like mowing the grass or unloading the dishwasher done. In your mind, you may take this as them passively-aggressively implying, with no words, that you are not doing enough to contribute to the household. Sound familiar?
But what of these stories is based on the truth? What are just made up stories we assume are accurate?
These assumptions we make up may not be causing issues now, but who's to say they won't down the road? If you are making assumptions about your partner or your marriage, now is the time to air these out. Again, counseling is a great place to gain a new perspective. A therapist can hear these assumptions and pinpoint what, if any, problems it is causing in your relationship.
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Even if you are happy in your marriage, it is never too soon or the wrong time to begin going to couples counseling. Contact us today to set up a free consultation or to schedule an appointment.